Breakdowns

Us on John's 30th bday

Well, it's that time again. Sunday evening. Not everything on my list got accomplished over the weekend. JP has packed up all the books and thrown away our rickety bookcase. Not that there is any way to truly prepare for a baby but I feel incredibly far behind! Everytime I think about it I start hyperventilating and my thought and feet turn to going to the mall to blow off steam. (it works but it's not the solution.)

I have about 100 days left and I've only been to Buy Buy Baby once. It's so overwhelming all the stuff. It's not like registering for pots/pans and blenders. It's a baby and it's going to need a bunch of stuff that I really have no idea about.

Within the last 2 weeks I've had two sobbing breakdowns that are triggered by being sad about something that's related to my general feeling about being unprepared for this major life change. I've found out about myself that I'm not that great with change though I've always thought I've loved living where the winds will take me I take a great comfort in stability and routine (see JP for the best example).

In anycase, I'm 25 weeks and little baby Y is kicking and swimming around. I missed yoga again but I got to hang out with the Halms over the weekend. She is so much fun and has so many funny things to say. One thing she really does have is a great sense of humor. We have jjajang myun and jjam bbong at Lunchtime with sister K. I decorated her door and hopes she wins the apartment decorating contest.